I write about what I like to call “Real Life Skills” because these are some of the mission critical pieces (particularly relating to self awareness) that I needed to learn and apply in order to function (let alone thrive) day-to-day — and I want to be the sort of mentor/person I needed when I was a kid and starting to flail in depression, disordered eating, and other stuff. Someone who understood what it was like to feel messy and all over the place, and who also knew (and was willing to share with me) that it was actually okay to feel that way, that I wasn’t bad, broken, wrong, or failing. Nope — I was human and life was messy sometimes. For everyone.
I’ve realized that what I write is not just for children and teens. It applies to me, too, every day of the week and twice on Sunday. It’s kind of ironic: when I write to try and “teach” them (because clearly I am so wise and they need so much help), the words don’t flow. It’s a different ballgame when I go the route of thinking about what I need to keep in mind.
So, I’m going to call a spade a spade: I’m writing what I need to be reminded of. And speaking, too, is a reminder to self about what I’ve learned and want to remember to help me stay anchored. Funnily enough, when I’m more anchored and in alignment, my kids seem to be too, without me needing to really “do” anything (or write something for them so they can “get it” — which rarely works out as I’d like anyway). When I take take care of my own business, everybody around me benefits. (I now understand differently the annoying childhood mantra: “Mind your own business!” — minding one’s own business actually is useful.)
For this moment, what if we set aside whatever we think our kids need to get, learn, change, or whatever, and our efforts in trying to make that happen? What do we need to hear today to help us get a little more anchored and in alignment? What if we go from there today? What if we put some of our focus and energy in for ourselves? Perhaps we’ll like the ripple effect that shows up in those around us, let alone what we see in/for ourselves. (And anyway I slice it, less time worrying about, stressing on, pleading with, or snapping at others is win-win in my house.)