A friend commented a while back:
“Life is crazy right now. There is so much to do. When things slow down, I’ll catch up. It’ll be easier; I’ll feel less stressed.”
Fast forward to now: Event after event has been cancelled or postponed due to the pandemic. Many of those out of the house “should/could dos”? Not happening. Our external world has slowed down. (And let’s not even talk about plans for the summer. I kind of feel like summer has been cancelled…and then rescheduled by some evil event planner. I appreciate the lists of online activities being shared — and it’s going to take more than that to survive this summer.)
Yet I’m still hearing the same thing: “Life is crazy right now. I feel stressed. When XYZ changes, things will be better, it’ll be easier.” And when I look at my own to do list? The things that have fallen off…have been replaced by others. My life has slowed down in some ways and sped up in others. My list may be different, but it’s just as long and no less stressful.
So I’m wondering: What if feeling less stressed and more cool, calm, better…is less about what’s happening in our external world, believe it or not? That if we want to feel less stressed, the button to find and push the heck out of is the one tied to us.
Wanting the outside to change first? Who isn’t there? However, we have little to no control over so much outside of us (hello COVID-19!!). So focusing the bulk of our attention and effort on what we can’t control is great if we want to feel more stressed and frustrated, though not so effective if we care to feel otherwise.
I want to feel otherwise…I’d guess you do, too. Because feeling stressed and overwhelmed sucks. So, let’s talk feeling otherwise.
“Less stressed, feel better” is not some mythical abstract place. We can get there.
It may not be what we picture, some out “there” place of rainbows and fairy dust where life is always beautiful and works out and we never again feel a moment of stress. (And summer is never cancelled.) No. Feeling better is messier, and it’s not a place to get to — it’s something we build. Though in the building there’s a magic, if you want to call it that, because we’re building it ourselves (in our control!). We don’t need to wait for it to be bestowed upon us or someone else to do it.
Building this feel better place is possible. It doesn’t take specialized skills or expensive tools. It’s doable for any of us. The key is in actually putting into practice the tools, taking the steps, staying the path…CONSISTENTLY.
Want to get to feel better now? I’ve got you covered; check out the resources below. And if you’re looking at the upcoming summer…full of cancelled events…dreading the thought of more of the same…wanting to avoid the yelling, tantrums, meltdowns, sass, and grumpiness…wondering how in the world you’re going to make it through in one piece? Let’s come up with a plan and make it happen. This summer doesn’t have to suck you dry. <3
Have a friend who is dreading the summer? Send over this post. It might be a lifesaver.